Life,Frustrations and Happiness

Sometimes life seems to be all about Frustrations.Frustations of one's own wrong decisions,frustrations of the after effects of those wrong decisions,frustrations of the failures we faced......frustrations of the rejections...a person can forget all good things happened to him but he can never forget wrong happenings ....specially done to him.

Doesn't this mean that negativity has a stronger impact on our lives.

Some negativities are avoidable and some are not.Things which are not connected to us emotionally are always avoidable.So is it necessary to connect with everyone emotionally....absolutely no ! In our lives most of our relationships aren't exactly emotional ones......but still they pour unhappiness at times.....why ?

Here comes another factor......which is the core reason of our frustrations or may be unhappiness and that is "Ego" .When somebody questions about your ability ....you get hurt immediately you try to answer him,you try to count him many points which proves you to be a responsible person or you start with a counter attack and start questioning his abilities.But is it compulsory or may be necessary to satisfy everyone ? No ! It is absolutely not necessary to satisfy everyone infact it is next to impossible to make everyone happy....

It was easy for Krishna to hold Govardhana with his little finger but to make all his disciples happy is impossible....forget about non-disciples.

For me principle of happiness or frustration free life revolves around you only......only a happy cook can prepare a Michelin recipe....similarly only a happy heart can make your loved ones really happy....forget about people who don't love you....they can never be satisfied.....So your happiness is what counts most....try to find stuff which makes you happy....rest everything will fall in place....:)

Ishq Unlimited

Few years back I had met an old man in a train on my way to Pune.....I was wearing a tattered jeans ....it had cuts on my knees :) while talking he said "see this ....our young generation spends money for torn clothes....I hid the cut at once and he said, "Don't hide it child...its your life and you like it....you should live your life the way you want....that's my point of view and it doesn't need to suit you"....I was amazed.....as well as exited to know more of him.....

During some discussion with the fellow passengers he was criticizing Pakistan for supporting terrorism....some muslim ladies were also there who were basically from Karachi ...he was persuading them to settle in India....after a while out of my curiousness I asked him about his family.....he said he lost his wife when he was 35 he had two sons at that time .....one is a manager in TCS now and one is a doctor settled in US....he was going to Pune for meeting the first boy....during his talks I came to know that he stays alone in Bhopal and was a sport officer in the university before retirement.....he opts to stay alone and visits both his sons every year for few days....so that no one hinders privacy and relationships are amicable and wanted.

He is 70 now .....he was 35 when his wife died.....he says he struggled with loads of demanding family requests for remarriage but he didn't remarry because first of all he loved his wife more than his life....and he didn't want to loose respect in the eyes of his kids that he cannot take care of them alone....if he would have died .....he was sure his wife would never ever had thought of remarrying.

He narrated me how he was transformed from an amateur cook to a perfect mommy type cook,how every morning he got up early for his boys to prepare their lunch boxes....to the time when they were adults and he attended their engineering  and medical counseling .... Etc etc 

He says both his sons their wives and their kids love their dad more than anything in this world....those are the bestest days of their lives when they get to be with their dad.....coz they believe that when they are with their dad ....They are with GOD :) 

When I reached Pune he gave his son's visiting card ....the name written was "Iqbal Habib Khan"

Uncle said My name is Habib Khan :) 

I was stunned and speechless.

I have never met a person like him before.....he was a Muslim man....forget remarriage.......his religion even allows him to have two wives....and he didn't even remarry.....faced all oddities,didn't take the short cut,played the role of mom and dad at the same time for bringing up his kids.....Amazing human being .....He gained immense Respect in my eyes.